You might be a gun nut if ....

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by dslmac2, Mar 25, 2012.

  1. dslmac2

    dslmac2 New Member

    You might be a gun nut if

    ... you ever seriously thought about dabbing on a little Hoppe's #9 before going out on a date.
    ... you cannot recall how many firearms you own.
    ... you buy a gun at a shop only to find out you used to own it a couple of years ago.
    ... your wife wants to wear black leather so you buy her a carry holster.
    ... you think John Moses Browning's birthday should be a national holiday.
    ... you have both the blued and nickel plated version of your favorite gun
    ... you consider it unpatriotic not to own at least one .45 and one .22.
    ... you put a Hogue Grip on your car's parking brake.
    ... you retrofit a laser sight to your TV remote control.
    ... you spend more on ammo each month than on food.
    ... your driver's license says "must wear night-vision goggles"
    ... you claim your local FFL dealer as a dependent on your tax return.
    ... you purchased two Glocks and two Sigs just to see which brand was better.
    ... you ever bought two brands of the same weight and type of bullet, just to see if one "shot better."
    ... you call Brownells and they know your voice.
    ... your gun safes cost more than all your furniture.
    ... you can't put your car in the garage because it's filled with buckets of wheel weights and lead ingots.
    ... the FBI asks you to identify firearms they can't.
    ... you ever had to explain, "It's NOT the same gun, it's a variation!"
    ... you have more GI ammo cans than the local Army Reserve unit. And they're full!
    ... you have more guns than some third-world countries.
    ... you named your pocket pistol "Little Guy" and your S&W .460 "Big Jake."
    ... the USGS visits you due to the gravitational anomaly all the ammo in your garage is causing.
    ... you own reloading dies for calibers that you do not shoot.
    ... you understand Smith & Wesson's model numbers.
    ... all your belts are made by holster makers.
    ... you have ever shot out a 1911 barrel.
    ... all the calendars in your house came from gun companies.
    ... you would rather ban alcohol than high-capacity clips/magazines.
    ... you read that "Brady II" would outlaw possession of more than 1,000 rounds of ammunition and think, "I have more than that rolling around loose in the trunk of my car!"
    ... you and your new father-in-law go to a gun show on your wedding day.
    ... your garage floor is cracked from the weight of all your ammo.
    ... your cat is named Mauser and your dog is Luger.
    ... you consider naming your unborn child Sig or Ruger.
    ... you named your twin sons Smith and Wesson
    ... your computer pass words are gun related.
    ... your local gunsmith calls you for obsolete parts.
    ... if when the TV news reports on a cache of weapons found at a criminals residence you always think to yourself "That's all he had? That ain't nothin"
    ... your girl friend thinks that aroma of Hoppes No.9 is your favorite after shave.
    ... you ever asked Hoppes if they would sell you their Hoppes Number 9 in 30-gallon drums.
    ... you always thought "Dirty Harry" was a wimp and did not use enough gun.
    ... you have guns in your safe that you can't, for the life of you, remember how you came by.
    ... you buy high capacity magazines for a gun you have not bought yet.
    ... you know 12 different names for one caliber of cartridge.
    ... your guns are cleaner than your residence.
    ... you have 5 different guns being processed at 3 different FFL dealers.
    ... four local gun shops know you by name.
    ... you're friends with 90% of the employee's at all the local gun shops.
    ... you have more gunpowder in your home than your local sporting goods store has on hand.
    ... if you make $40 per hour at work, but spend 30 minutes on your knees at the range looking for that last piece of .40 S&W brass.
    ... you have an open account with Federal, Hornady, Cor-Bon, Winchester and Remington.
    ... your personalized license plate is 357SIG, Glock, or BREN 10.
    ... you clean out your trunk and find 1000 rounds of ammo you forgot about.
    ... a friend shows up with a pistol that was last made 50 years ago and only 10 were ever made, and you have the correct holster for it.
    ... you have windchimes made from shell casings.
    ... you can tell the caliber of an empty cartridge by feel.
    ... you buy your holsters in matched sets, just in case.
    ... all your trousers are let out so you can wear a IWB holster.
    ... you found that if you sold all your gun stuff, you could by a Rolls Royce, - for cash.
    ... your dream home would have a 100 yard indoor range in the basement.
    ... you own more than 2 chronographs.
    ... your mailbox has a Weaver Rail on top.
    ... your bridal registry is at the local gun shop.
    ... you have more cubic feet of your home devoted to gun-related materials than clothing.
    ... you have bought at least one gun just to "see how it shoots" and traded it off a month later
    ... your concealed carry weapon varies by your mood
    ... you were more excited when you got your concealed weapons license than when you got your drivers license
  2. Happysniper1

    Happysniper1 New Member

    You missed a couple:


    Most of your shirts were bought at gunshows
    When you step on the brake, loose brass rolls around in your car (or pickup)
    You can tell the caliber of brass by the noise it makes in the washing machine
    You watch cops walk by and wonder what ammo they have chambered
    When your daughter says she needs hair clips, you think of ammo clips
    When the guys talk about strippers, and you think of stripper clips

    Have a nice day! :D

  3. SquadCapt4

    SquadCapt4 New Member

    I'm going to share this with Hickock45 if you don't mind, dsl. I think he fits about 85% of these. :)
  4. alba666

    alba666 New Member

    +1. But we need to get people like him in front of the undecided.
  5. You have individual names for each one of your guns and you refer to each one by their given name.
  6. NWGlockgal

    NWGlockgal Active Member

    LOL, I think this is my favorite:

  7. GAgal

    GAgal Well-Known Member

    Doesn't everyone?!? :D
  8. Shep482

    Shep482 Well-Known Member Supporter

    A couple of these hit dead on. I have to change my password at work every 6 weeks. Always gun related.
    I always see news stories about gun and ammo caches with over "1000 rounds!!" Gasp! I always think " they'd poop their pants if they saw my ammo cabinet.
  9. ^^^+1!!!!!! Every gun has a name!!!
  10. gladesbassin

    gladesbassin Happy Member :) Supporter

  11. too. I liked "if you have a Glock 17, 19, and 26, but you conceal carry the 17!"

    He did miss one..."if you wish Hickok45 was your uncle so you could shoot at the 'Compound' during family reunions!"
  12. Webphisher

    Webphisher Duct Tape, Alabama Chrome

    Man, I keep denying at work that I'm a gun nut...but like half of those apply to me.
  13. I don't even try to deny it anymore. Very liberating when you finally acknowledge the greatness that gun nuttiness.
  14. buildit

    buildit Another gun nut

    -You have the 2nd amendment tattooed on your chest
    -You family gets you guns and ammo for Christmas and your birthday
    -You track the rounds and hours of use for each gun in a spread sheet
    -You use the have spread sheet to ensure they all get equal range time
    -On more than one occasion you have gotten out of a speeding ticket by switching the conversation to guns........You've lost more than one girl because you were late for the date because you were on the side of the road discussing guns with a police officer.
    -You are still friends with many officers you met on the side of the road. ;)