From Fear to Gear in a Year!!

I Am new here- and not sure if anyone else has previously been afraid of guns until now.
Sorry for the long story in advance but it's an interesting one.
I am ready to buy my first gun. My husband has many- but I am new to shooting. As I said in another post- there is no "mine" and "yours" in our lives- just ours- but I refer to the firearms as "his because he registered them and until nota I had no interest. So until now- they were "his" guns.
- I have had a nearly 20 year fear of guns. Started when my friend was accidentally shot in the chest with a .25 cal point blank in my bedroom when I was 16. The bullet was 1/8 of an inch away from her heart. I remember the sound- the blood and holding my hand over the hole in her chest while we waited for the ambulance. She survived and it was an accident but I was "Gun Shy" (pun intended) ever since.
My husband (boyfriend at the time of the shooting) has always been a responsible gun enthusiast. (he was not the shooter). He respected my fear and would not have the guns around me- which limited his enjoyment but as a gentleman- he never complained.

About a year ago- my baby was sick and spent the night on the 2nd floor in my bedroom so my husband took the couch for the night. I was up late (nervous about my child's fever) and about 2 am I saw headlights slowly go past my window. We lived in PA at the time on a quiet dead end block near the end of the cul-de-sac. We had a thick wooded lot and there were no street lights.
I got up and went to the window to see what it was. I noticed a car (headlights) very very slowly continue pass my house. It turned around in the cul-de-sac and pulled into the house next to mine.
This was very strange as I know the neighbors and they were home since 8pm.
I went downstairs and woke my husband. I explained what I saw and he jumped to the window to peek. At that moment the car pulled out of the neighbors driveways and slowly drove towards mine.
My husband grabbed his .40 caliber 24/7 Taurus told me to lock all the doors as he slipped out the back door.
We had a driveway sensor as part of our security system that sends a beep into a kitchen speaker that alarms us whenever a car, bike or anything metal comes onto our property.
I heard the beep and ran down to the finished basement to wake my brother who was staying with us. He jumped up and ran outside.
What happened was my husband quietly snook around the back- through the woods and came up behind the drivers side door. He pointed the gun- opened the door and put it to the guys head. He made the guy put his hands on the steering wheel.

Now- some might think that that might be a bit aggressive for someone "just" driving up your driveway-
But let this put it in perspective- As soon as my husband saw the car from the woods- he recognized the guy!

About 2 weeks earlier- during the afternoon- we came home from shopping and found some young guy on our property. We have a wooded lot with a very long driveway. This is a rural area on a dead end block. My husband got out and asked the guy why he was there. He claimed he was driving around looking for "scrap metal". He claimed He drove past and saw a baby car seat outside our garage. He said he was a new dad , out of work and thought we were throwing it away.
Before shopping I did put a new car seat in our suburban- and was planning on donating the old one. So it was outside next to my garage door. So that part of the story checked out. My husband being the teddy bear that he is- asked if there was any other baby items I could give him. He continued to speak to the guy while I went in the garage to collect the baby stuff.

We gave him 3 bags full. My husband is a very charitable man. He is a Brooklyn born kid that knows what it's like to start out rough. So he helps whoever he can - whenever he can, but never take his kindness for weakness- He's No Sucker!
I said I had more baby things and I would get them together. My husband gave him $20 and told him to drive by the following day for the baby items..... but warned him to only pull in if he sees the truck in the driveway. He said -"Bro- let me make it clear- if you don't see my truck here- DO NOT PULL IN. You might get yourself hurt". The guy agreed, thanked us and went on his way.
We felt good about helping out a young father in need. We even talked about paying him for some odd jobs around the property. We agreed we would talk to him the next day about it.
Next day- nothing.
Following day..... Nothing.
So I donated everything to charity by the weekend and thought nothing of it.

Going forward-The night that my husband put the gun to this guys head- our suburban was in the shop.
It looked like no one was home.
It was 2 am- and he shut his headlights off when he pulled in the driveway.
He thought we were away!
So as soon as my husband saw this guy in this car at my house- he connected the dots.
When he opened the drivers side door- he saw a crowbar- hammer- black gloves and a screwdriver in the front seat with a garbage bag.
Seeing this- It was extremely hard for this "teddy bear" not to turn Grizzly. Everything was running thru his head at once.....Missing garden tools on our property- missing gas cans- my mom visited the week before-she forgot to lock the car door and her suitcase went missing overnight.
Then he realized that he was supposed to travel to NYC that night. He only cancelled his trip because our daughter had a fever,
It all connected. He saw red. He realized what he just stopped. What if he was not home. Just me and our daughters alone. Even with all the firearms in the home- I had a huge fear and wouldn't touch them.
He looked up at the house and saw my 2 daughters looking out the window.
To this day he said he believes that is what kept him from pulling the trigger.

My brother ran in the house and told me to call 911. I did. I let them know that my husband is a registered gun owner and had his 40 caliber to the guys head.
Still took the police 55 minutes to get to our home! While he waited the guy begged and pleaded. He said he "took a wrong turn" into my driveway. Before the cops came my husband had my brother take his wallet. He took out the license. He had my brother ask me to make a copy. And put it back in his wallet.
He told the guy "you know where I live- Now I know where you live too!".

The police arrived- they knew the guy. He is apparently a regular in handcuffs. But they DID NOT ARREST HIM! They gave him a summons to appear in court for trespass and attempted burglary. When my husband asked why he was not being arrested- They told my husband he should have let the guy try to get in.
My husband said "WHAT? And let him scare my wife and kids- or what if he had a gun?".
The Cop said "or you should have shot him".
We could not believe their response.

Winds up the guy was out on bail for robbing a Walmart and shoplifting at a Kmart.
So the next day my husband made flyers with the guys drivers license. He lived only 5 minutes from my home. On the flyer- my husband wrote "beware- thief, trespasser and con artist! He wrote the basics of what happened plus pulled a criminal report and listed all the things he was arrested for in the past. My husband posted them in ever single mailbox on the GUYS BLoCk, all over his community- at the grocery store- EVERY WHERE!
He googled the address and found a phone number. This 25 year old loser lives with his father- who was a hard working man In the community. My husband called his dad. He told him "Father to Father- I just want you to know I almost killed your son last night.". The father began to cry. He had no idea. The son didn't tell him anything that happened. He put his house up for his sons bail and warned one more thing and he is cut off.

So after this incident I reevaluated my fears. I realized that the threat of anyone entering my home uninvited was a billion times more freighting than a gun In the right hands.
I had never been more Grateful or Proud of my HERO than I was that night.
I also had never been more unsure of my own capabilities than I was that night.
And THAT SCARED the **** out of me. If my husband had gone to NYC- what would I have done? Could I protect my girls? My Home? My Self?
So that's when I made my husband take out his guns for me for the first time.
He showed me every one- one by one.
How to unlock them - how to load them. How to unload them. How to hold them. Where they were located around the house.
And for a year- I have gotten over my fear. It took a while- but the next step was to Shoot them.
I am happy to say that a week ago today I shot my first firearm. AND I LOVED IT!!!!
I was "gun high" for a week! Still am. Not only for self defense- but I enjoyed shooting! And I was told by my husband and the range manager that I was a great shot too.
I still have a lot to learn and I have a lot of practice ahead of me. But I am getting my confidence slowly. Once I am more experienced- I plan on getting my concealed permit.
My husband had to travel this week and spent 2 days away from home. For the first time- I did t have that "unsafe" feeling. I felt confident. I didn't feel like a helpless woman.

That night threatened to take away everything I have to live for.
But my husbands actions taught me to not to fear the weapon-
Respect the Weapon and Fear the Threat.
So that's how I went from Fear To Gear in a Year! :0)

 

Wow! Idiots never cease to amaze me. Thank god She was not injured. I mention her because anyone that reckless with a weapon deserves to be injured.

The shooting involving the 25 was at the end of a double date with my husband (then boyfriend) - his buddy, me and my friend. My husbands friend was 18 and illegally obtained and carried the 25. He lived and worked in a bad area - he was a bit of a "pretty boy" and sought out a gun to protect himself. I'm not giving an excuse-'just stating the facts.
At the end of our date- we all went back to my house to listen to music and talk. I had a pretty small room and had a leather couch that we were sitting on. Apparently the girl was sitting on his lap facing him. He had the gun in his front waist band and pulled it out to show it off. Being completely irresponsible and untrained- he took the clip out but forgot the one in the chamber. He has always claimed he never touched the trigger but the gun just "went off". I always felt differently because the gun never "accidentally went off" when he had it in his pants pointing to his special member.
My husband and I didn't see any of this- as the room was dark with purple walls and only a blue lightbulb was on plus the music was extremely loud. Not to mentioned were not interested at all as to what they were up to.
The shot was deafening. I jumped what felt like 25 feet in the air. We all walked slowly into the kitchen. My husband checked to see if everyone was ok- and we thought we all were. The girl was wearing a white shirt and had her hand over her heart. She didn't appear to be injured. And not to trash her but she was a very over dramatic girl. So what felt like hours was probably seconds- she looked fine. I asked "your ok- right?". And she said very very calmly- "I think I was shot!". She then moved her hand and I saw a black hole in her chest that immediately began to fill with blood!
My dad was home and on the other side of the apartment. But we had a bar style pool table win my kitchen and he thought that the noise was someone slamming the pool ball on the slate.
My husband and dad made her go back in my room and lay on the couch and I called 911.
Even though it was an accident- The shooter- RAN.
The police came and immediately handcuffed my husband to a picketed gate outside my apartment until they could sort it out- even though the girl was yelling from the stretcher it wasn't him and it was an accident.
The girls father showed up-(they lived 2 blocks away) and was told a boy shot her. Not knowing who it was - he approached the only guy in cuffs and started punching my husband in the face while he was cuffed behind his back. Not that he had much choice- but My husband just took it. He later said if he was the father and found out his daughter was shot- he would have done much worse to a guy cuffed at then scene.
So the shooter turned himself in about an hour later. but then wanted a "friend" in jail and tried to get my husband to lie and say he gave him the gun so he wouldn't be alone. Of course my husband was not that stupid and it ended their friendship. He served 6 months in Rikers Island for possession.
The girl came home 3 days later with the slug still lodged as the doctors said it needed to surface on its own- which it later did.
My husband sent care packages to the prison because he is a nice guy but he never spoke to his "friend" again. And they were buddies since kindergarten.

 

I can't say I was always afraid of guns- but then again I was never around anything bigger than a BB Gun. Lol. I know my big fear started with the accidental shooting.
Although I have A Lot to learn- I'm getting there. And I am 1,000,000,000 % more confident than I was before the incident last year. Before that- I would freak out if my husband would shoot a blank!
I'm glad your wife has faced her fears as well. I have to say first time shooting is an exhilarating moment.